Sometimes I feel like such a failure as a woman because I can't ever manage to get the house as clean as I want, there's always laundry to be done, I have so many craft projects & scrap projects that are "works in progress"...there's just never enough hours in the day! I'm hoping in a few years when my kids are in school I'll feel like I have a better handle on it all. Right now, they both require almost all my attention....actually they could take 100% of my attention if I let them! Riley would love it if I just played with him all day and Kira would love it if I held her constantly and never put her down. But there's so much stuff that needs to be done to keep a house going. Cleaning cleaning cleaning and then there's "deep cleaning".
It's a big job and can be overwhelming but I do feel so lucky to have the life I do. I am unbelievably blessed with two children. After I lost Aiden I never thought I'd have a baby. A healthy baby, that is. Then I got my Riley. After him, I didn't dare dream for another. I had a miscarriage, then my beautiful Kira came along. If I was guaranteed a smooth pregnancy and delivery and money were no object I'd love to have one more, but I honestly am so happy and grateful to have the two that I do. There are many ladies out there who want to be moms and are waiting and my heart just breaks for them. I wish everyone who really truly wanted to be a parent would have the chance. It would also be nice if people who have no business having kids could be prevented from doing so. Amber from Teen Mom comes to mind here.
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